FIGURED I’D SHARE A FUNNY MOMENT FROM LAST NIGHT’S monthly Roanoke Valley Sports Club meeting, where Virginia Tech assistant coach Shane Beamer was the guest speaker. After an entertaining speech in which he gave a nice overview of personnel and the upcoming season, Beamer opened it up for questions.
Sitting near the front of the room, 70-year-old Tech fan Carol McGuire-Bishop pounced.
“Are you trying to find some good O-linemen?” she said point-blank.
“Well,” Shane said with a smile. “We don’t try to find BAD ones, I can say that.”
McGuire-Bishop is a longtime Tech football season ticket holder from Clifton Forge — hometown of Bryan Stinesping — and noted that “Stinespring won’t ever answer my questions.” She kept after Shane, grilling him about missed blocks and questionable special teams play. The late Mike Wallace would have been proud.
“You’re on a roll,” Shane said at one point. “I’m not going to stop you.”
“What’s that?” Shane said.
“A national championship.”
Shane jokingly invited her to today’s 8 a.m. coaches staff meeting.
Shane handled it all great, of course, and managed to answer all the questions while keeping things light. Later, when I tweeted that he’d done a superb job while being “grilled” by a 70-year-old woman, Shane (@CoachSBeamer) tweeted: “‘Grilled’ is being nice. I think she referred to our ‘dismal’ O-Line and ‘bad’ special teams. Tough crowd!”
-Somebody asked Shane if there were any restrictions on recruiting current Penn State players, and he said there were not. “I’ve never seen anything like it,” he said. “It’s a free-for-all at Penn State.”
-Shane can sympathize with current PSU coach Bill O’Brien. They were on staff together at Georgia Tech in 2000, when Shane was a grad assistant.
-Shane said several current PSU players had reached out to Tech but he couldn’t say where that would lead.
-Somebody asked Shane whether he calls Frank “Coach” or “Dad” when they’re on the sidelines. “Neither, if I can help it.” Said he just looks at Frank and starts talking, hoping that his father will realize he’s addressing him. If Frank doesn’t appear to notice, Shane just moves closer until he does. Said it would be awkward if he called him “Coach” or “Dad,” but in situations where he must call him something, he’ll call him “Coach Beamer.” “He’s called me a bunch of things besides Shane, I can tell you that,” Shane quipped.
-Shane mentioned that the Hokies have several good walk-on punters and kickers who were offered scholarships at other schools. When he gets asked why they’d choose to walk on at Tech rather than accept a scholly elsewhere, he jokes: “They saw us kick last year.” In other words, they know an opportunity when they see it.
LOCAL HEADLINES FOR TUESDAY: Seth Greenberg hired as ESPN college basketball analyst (good Berman blog post here)…Wake QB Tanner Price recruited colleges, not the other way around (story here)…New Lord Botetourt coach Jamie Harless likes what he sees in Daleville (story here)…Ricky Mast’s run in the MLB Fan Cave comes to an end (story here).
NATIONAL HEADLINES: Cubs trade Geovany Soto to Rangers…Cliff Lee reportedly on trading block as nonwaiver deadline to deal looms today…ESPN reports that PSU running back Silas Redd is leaning toward transferring to Southern Cal…Hope Solo stands by her ridiculous opinion that NBC announcers should be a mouthpiece for the U.S. team and never, ever, ever say anything critical about their play on the field (OK, I’m paraphrasing, but that’s the gist of it).
NAME THAT TUNE
I can make money open up a thrift store
I can make a living off a magazine
I can design an engine sixty-four
Miles to a gallon of gasoline
I can make new antibiotics
I can make computers survive aquatic conditions
I know how to run a business
And I can make you wanna buy a product
Movers, shakers and producers
Me and my friends understand the future
I see the strings that control the systems
I can do anything with no assistance
I can lead a nation with a microphone
With a microphone
With a microphone
I can split the atoms of a molecule
Of a molecule
Of a molecule