Sunday’s column: Saving the Taubman, behind the scenes
Ever have a strange dream? It happens to me all the time.
The other night, it was about the Taubman Museum of Art. But it wasn’t about the museum. It was about the recent takeover by the local luminaries who brought us that building four years ago. And the behind-the-scenes conversations among them that preceded the recent coup.
I dreamed I was a fly on the wall of Heywood Fralin’s office when his phone rang. You know Fralin — he’s the local art connoisseur and Mid-Atlantic nursing home king. The caller was Nick Taubman, the auto parts titan and former ambassador.
To answer, Fralin pushed the button for the speakerphone.
FRALIN: Hello?
TAUBMAN: Woody, is that you?
FRALIN: Who’s this?
TAUBMAN: It’s Nicky.
FRALIN: Nicky? Nicky WHO? I don’t know any Nickys.
TAUBMAN: Come on, Woody. It’s me, the guy they named the art museum after.
FRALIN: Nicky, you’ve got a lot of nerve, calling me. That was supposed to by MY museum.
TAUBMAN: Settle down, Woody. You’ve got your museum now. It’s up in Charlottesville and . . .
FRALIN: Yeah. It’s 100 darn miles away!
TAUBMAN: Cry me a river. That’s 20 minutes in your helicopter. They got most of your art, right?
FRALIN: You’re darn right they did. You think I want my stuff hanging with those dreary Thomas Eakin mugs in that monstrosity on Salem Avenue?
TAUBMAN: I’m calling about the Taubman Museum of Art.
FRALIN: You know what I call it? ‘The Taubman Museum of Art and Failure,’ and . . .
TAUBMAN: It’s going under, Woody. They’re going to have to shut down.
FRALIN: . . . I have to say, it’s failing spectacularly. You saw what the University of Chicago wrote, right? ‘Build it and they won’t come,’ ha.
TAUBMAN: That’s why I’m calling. We’ve got to do something.
FRALIN: I’m not sure I’ve ever seen any museum flop so badly. Scuttlebutt is, your gross revenue for August was $3.98.
READ THE REST OF THIS COLUMN HERE.
October 28, 2012 - 6:00 AM
You don’t see trebuchet used enough.
OK, what the heck does “trebuchet” mean? Other than using a word that most people never heard of, Dan, this has got to be one of your best tongue and cheek article ever. And you are not far off in putting the Weiner Stand in there in place of Noah’s. That damn place is as expensive as some of the stuff hanging on the walls. Thanks for great laughter to start the day…!
But the food in Norah’s is good and the chef/owner is a very nice guy.
Re: #s 1 & 2
Never been to a Pumpkin Chunkin contest?
http://tinyurl.com/8c7lab8
http://tinyurl.com/8mdv94m
E. Duane, a trebuchet is a type of medieval catapult.
Debbie, I didn’t say it wasn’t and I know he’s a very nice person…..That’s not the point obviously…!
Thanks Dan, post your blog on my FB and ask people to guess what the word means….You man have not really had that dream, but you must have been up all night thinking about it and putting it all down on paper…My style of writing I think I try often to do….Cut this one out and as I do with articles on local issues, I put them in folders and plan on leaving them to the Virginia Room…Hope this one makes the folder on the Taubman…Oh, and here’s a little chuckle….A news lady on a local channel was reporting something on the Taubman….and she pronounced it…”TUBman”….Now that was a great slip ..
Interesting dream Dan and funny as hell. But I just can’t wrap my mind around the Heywood Fralin that I know ever having a conversation like that. Too much of a Va. Gentleman! And I’m not sure if the Wiener Stand would save the Taubman or the Taubman would kill the Wiener Stand!
dave,
It was just a strange dream!
Re: Comment by Dan Casey — October 28, 2012 @ 11:01 am
A trebuchet is a type of a medieval siege engine, which is weight powered. A catapult is a different type of siege engine dating back to the 1st century BC, which is bow or other flexed material powered. Why can’t you MSM keep weapon terminology straight?
.
BTW, you being into the print and web media, I first wondered if you were refereeing to the Trebuchet MS sans-serif typeface font. But I couldn’t picture a four-story trebuchet letter. Then a low-bar “A” might fit the story.
[/satire font off]
It’s a siege machine, E. Duane. For getting over medieval battlements and fortresses.
Sorry didn’t see DaveH’s answer. I guess it’s been thoroughly answered.:)
Don’t make Dan go all Comic Sans on you, Dave.
I know it wasn’t your point, E. Duane, I just thought it was worth mentioning.
I have a picture somewhere of my 4 year old son sitting on the base of a trebuchet in Les Baux a long time ago…maybe this is a sign it’s time to unearth it.
I have a picture somewhere of my 4 year old son sitting on the base of a trebuchet in Les Baux a long time ago
OMG. The wanna-be never quits. Hon, your kid never got out of Bayonne until he was 10 and moved here with you.
Re: Comment by Suzie — October 28, 2012 @ 12:53 pm
More envy of folk who have actually traveled? Hum?
Re: Comment by Kristen — October 28, 2012 @ 12:26 pm
No apology need. I comment w/o having read the whole thread, all the time.
Besides, it nice to agree on things, from time to time, even if I were ribbing Dan a tad.
.
What’s the story on the picture above….I’m seeing suff that’s really not the building, am I not?
taubman ‘museum’..what a farce
#19 I’m guessing that pammie’s never even been in it.
Nonsense, gdad…pammallala strikes me as quite the aficionado of the arts.
Re: Comment by Kristen — October 29, 2012 @ 1:45 pm
Nah. Pole dancing is not considered art under the 1A exemption.
See: http://tinyurl.com/8beh56g
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U.S. Supreme Court Won’t Hear Strip Club Fee Case
by Emily Ramshaw
January 25, 2012
The U.S. Supreme Court will not take up the adult entertainment industry’s lawsuit against the state’s $5-per-patron strip club tax, justices decided Monday.
“Texas is now one step closer to a sustainable source of funding for rape crisis centers, and most importantly, for supporting sexual assault survivors in their recovery,” said Annette Burrhus Clay, executive director of the Texas Association Against Sexual Assault.
SNIP
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