In case you missed it, the Virginia House of Delegates last approved a resolution for a commission to study establishing a Virginia currency, if the Federal Reserve system collapses. Cost to taxpayers for the commission: $17,440. Let’s take a minute to imagine that committee’s report.
M E M O
From: Del. Bob Marshall’s Currency Commission
To: Virginia General Assembly
Subject: Our deliberations and recommendations
Gentle men and women of the oldest legislature in the Western Hemisphere:
After many hours of dinner meetings and $17,440 worth of prime beef, succulent 3-pound lobsters, and flagons of aged bourbon and claret, we’re pleased to bring you the following recommendations regarding a future Virginia currency.
First, it is vital we take this step. Every kook in the country knows the Federal Reserve is headed toward failure. The nuts are expecting the Old Dominion to lead the way out of that mess.
Therefore, we recommend you immediately establish a Virginia State Mint, the location of which is to be determined. One of those totally unnecessary prisons we built in the 1990s might be the most fitting place, symbolically. Red Onion, perhaps?
Second, the currency should be a coin, rather than paper, because the former will last far longer and cost taxpayers much less. We will get into the preferred material later in this summary.
Third, and this is important: We must carefully avoid any use of the term “Confederate” on the new coinage. Recall, we went down that road once before. And that didn’t turn out too swell.
Fourth, we deliberated a long time about a name for the new coin. One member suggested the “Bobby” after Del. Marshall. But he modestly pooh-poohed the idea and offered up the “Kenny,” after his favorite attorney general.
But we quickly realized how unseemly it would be to name it after anyone still alive. We decided instead to call it the “Virgin,” after our beloved commonwealth.
READ THE REST OF THIS COLUMN HERE.