From: The United Nations
To: Our operatives in Western Virginia
Subject: Our plan to take over Roanoke County, Va., hits a snag
It’s come to our attention that some members of the Roanoke Tea Party have sniffed out the secret plot to establish a beachhead for one-world government in the Blue Ridge Mountains.
Recently, they successfully persuaded the Roanoke County Board of Supervisors to vote down “urban development areas,” a planning concept called for by Virginia’s GOP-sponsored 2007 omnibus transportation act.
Somehow the Tea Party figured out it was part of Agenda 21, our sneaky “UN sponsored effort to destroy property rights.” That’s what their Web site says.
As you know, this scheme has been the United Nations’ highest priority for years. We had thought Roanoke County was the perfect dupe from which to launch a nationwide takeover.
Before you shout, “Curses! Foiled again!” we want you to know that many of our other operations in the Roanoke region remain intact. This memo briefly outlines those and sets forth how we intend to strike back against those Tea Party Dudley-Do-Rights. Read more »