Three mayors. One deputy mayor. One member of the governor's cabinet. Fire inspectors. Municipal planners. Two state aseemblymen. And five rabbis.
All (except one) Democrats.
All (allegedly) as crooked as the old road up Mill Mountain. All snared Thursday in a vast federal corruption probe involving black-market kidneys, fake Gucci handbags, and God knows how much in laundered money and bribes.
Where else could this happen but New Jersey? From the AP:
Prosecutors then used an informant in that investigation to help them go after corrupt politicians. The informant - a real estate developer charged with bank fraud three years ago - posed as a crooked businessman and paid a string of public officials tens of thousands of dollars in bribes to get approvals for buildings and other projects in New Jersey, authorities said.
Among the 44 people arrested were the mayors of Hoboken, Ridgefield and Secaucus, Jersey City's deputy mayor, and two state assemblymen. A member of the governor's cabinet resigned after agents searched his home, though he was not arrested. All but one of the officeholders are Democrats.
. . .The politicians arrested were not accused of any involvement in the money laundering or the trafficking in human organs and counterfeit handbags.
That's right. No funny stuff like human-organ trafficking for Jersey pols. They prefer their corruption the way I take my whiskey: neat and straight up. Cash bribes only, please.
Now, don't get me wrong. I love New Jersey. I lived there from ages 7 to 13, in Morris County, in the towns of White Meadow Lake, Mine Hill, and Mountain Lakes.
New Jersey has great towns. It has the best beaches on the Eastern seaboard, by far. You haven't experienced grassroots American patriotism until you've been to an American Legion in New Jersey on Memorial Day or the 4th of July. The public schools I attended in New Jersey would rival the best private schools almost anywhere else.
Some of the funniest and most talented people are from New Jersey. Bruce Springsteen was born in Long Branch, which was also the birthplace of Norman Mailer. Jack Nicholson is from Neptune City; Allen Ginsberg from Newark. Sarah Vaughn. Meryl Streep. Abbott & Costello. Whitney Houston. Frank Sinatra. Antonin Scalia. All from New Jersey. Thomas Edison's invention factory was there. And it's got The Real Housewives of New Jersey, one of the best shows on television. Everything about New Jersey is real, and in your face.
But ranking above all other New Jersey superlatives is graft. No other state comes close. New York and Pennsylvania are mere pikers. Blago tried to grab the honor for Illinois, but he fell way short. Jersey pols were offering themselves for sale before he was even born. Before his mother was even born. The backwater of Louisiana is a soggy and distant second.
Even the pepperoni on New Jersey's delicious pizzas is crooked. There are a few honest people, but they're treated like lepers and and other social outcasts.
Love to hear your New Jersey stories, if you've got them!