2008.03.12
Taking the song literally
We've seen it before, we saw it again: Eliot Spitzer solicited hookers, and standing by her man was his wife, Silda Wall Spitzer. The Harvard-educated lawyer, I'm referring to Silda, looked as though she'd been up all night crying.
She probably had been.
Dag, the scenario has played out so often: Men have been in hot spots, and their loyal spouse has stood there, being, well, loyal. Is it me or am I the only one who'd seriously think, "Buddy, you're on your own on this one"?
Think about how the scene has played out so many times:
Gary Hart's wife, Lee, standing next to him when the world found out about his "Monkey Business"
Dina McGreevey stood on the dais with her husband former New Jersey Gov. James McGreevey after he admitted to having an extramarital homosexual affair
And who can forget Effie Barry knitting (or was it crocheting?) in court as she sat in support of her husband Marion?
Last month, in my home state, Detroit mayor Kwame Kilpatrick was foolish enough to lie under oath about his affair with his female chief of staff. Didn't he know that those steamy text messages that documented their trysts would eventually surface? They did. Guess who was there when he apologized to city residents? That's right: wife Carlita Kilpatrick.
I've never been married, but is standing there with a pained, "I want to choke the ever-living crap out of this bonehead" a test of the "for better or worse" reference in the wedding vows? These women's obvious pain and humiliation break my heart every time I see one of these situations.
To add a little levity to the moment, my favorite line in light of the Spitzer moment came from Joy Behar of The View:
"Aren’t you sick of men? Viagra is destroying our government."
I was very proud of my wife last night when she told me she'd be out the door if she heard I did something like that. Her momma didn't raise a fool.
Not sure what's going on with the other women. Standing on the podium while this guy delivered his apology is little more than playing political pawn.
Comment by Ed S. — March 12, 2008 @ 9:10 am
i would like to suggest that you should go back to your home state!
don't tempt me, but what's your reason?--s
Comment by josiah — March 12, 2008 @ 9:17 am
Shanna, what you are saying here is correct in many ways. I see women as well lack backbone to stand up and say no-more! I personally hope that you stick around town for I enjoy your writings and your thoughts on many great subjects!!! --B Bishop
Comment by Bev Bishop — March 12, 2008 @ 10:07 am
YOU CONTINUALLY MISS THE POINT. "DON'T TEMPT ME", WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN???
Comment by josiah — March 12, 2008 @ 11:37 am
Ha!Ha! LOL!!!!
Your words borrowed or otherwise hit the spot.
You are so correct why don't these women stand up for themselves and do the right then. Public image of being true to yourself and not an ideal is what will get my attention and not perpetuation of the lie or infidelity.
Josiah in a time when our young people minds are impressionable one would attend to agree with Shanna comments.
Unless the Smiling Bob Commercial has proven to much to handle, or Wal-Greens has had a run on Cialis. Whatever the case when we as men and women make a comment before friends and family we should accept the responsibility of our foolish decent.
One more thing you should respect The First Amendment, and our host.
Comment by Backlash — March 12, 2008 @ 11:46 am
You left out Hillary & Bill (I did not have sex with that woman)
Comment by sue — March 12, 2008 @ 12:35 pm
First of all, if writing "fluff" articals is your thing, stick with pieces such as this. Adults are supposed to be just that, adult. Who should be of concern here, in my estimation are the children. As they see, and hear,this sexual stuff, and just how this is computed within children,I say let's clean up our airwaves and print. An ad every 1/2 hour for a male enhancement drug, is wrong.
Mistakes were made[not the 1st time], he has lost his job: find out how deep it goes, act and be done with it.
If I was his wife, he'd be kicked to the curb, ASAP, but some people are consumed by how things appear, in public.
Comment by Dona Wheeler — March 12, 2008 @ 1:54 pm
I say make him stand up there alone, unless of course you want to be President of the United States one day. Then you can stand there, swallow your pride and wait your turn. Otherwise, leave his $ss immediately and take the kids with you. There is no "protecting the kids" when their own father is a scoundrel. HE should have thought of that.
Come on, Alison, you really need to work at being more direct. Your post made me LOL! You go, girl!--s
Comment by Alison — March 12, 2008 @ 3:48 pm
sue, that's great...reminds me of bill (that depends on what the defination of is,is).
Comment by josiah — March 13, 2008 @ 9:57 am
josiah:
want to "enlighten" us on what the definition of "defination" might be? maybe YOU need the one way ticket to michigan.
Comment by mike — March 15, 2008 @ 4:03 am
O.k. come on now we all make typos and errors...there is no need for anyone to go any-where! Are we not adults here? It is alright for people to agree to disagree without pointing out spelling or such that is a small mess of stringed green beans considering all that is seriously going on in our world today and every day! I make errors as well and major typos...and I never said that I was a typist! I like the debates here typos, spelling errors and all! I also like thae fact that there is noone perfect on this earth and if they are then ghees ole flip, take me to them! Have a great day folks...BB
Comment by Bev Bishop — March 19, 2008 @ 10:41 am
You know, it's weird to see this blog, because I was thinking this very same thing when I saw that picture. It is asking a lot of her to be standing there. I wondered her motives; was she a pawn, or could she be standing by him for other reasons, like love or duty.
My grandfather cheated on his second wife. She stayed with him and years later says the son they had was a gift because she did the right thing.
So I can see where standing by your man works, but it's not right for everyone. I don't know that I could do it.
It's very suspicious that almost every political person's (in this situation) wife stands by him while he appologizes. I would imagine though that when she decided to stand by him to run for office she made the commitment to stand by him through it all, no matter what. My grandmother believed that you should never start doing something for your husband that you didn't plan to do for the rest of your life.
I don't think it's fluff to wonder how that image affects women. I'm sure to some, she's doing her duty, and to others she's setting the women's movement back. Whatever your opinion, it's a good dialogue to have going.
And honestly, it would be nice, for at least once, to see a man standing up there all by himself. Her standing there makes it seem like he is forgiven even before he appologizes to the people.
Comment by Dana — March 19, 2008 @ 2:54 pm