2009.01.23
Not feeling the puppy love
I, like most responsible adults with a day job, was pretty much sound asleep in my bed at 3:30 this morning. Stormy, our now 10-month-old puppy, was not sound asleep.
Of course, he is not responsible, an adult, or employed, so why not party?
We let all three of our dogs sleep in our bedroom, and Stormy is usually the one who wakes us up with his happy little song, occasionally as early as 5 a.m. But today he started auditioning for "American Idol" at half past three, and frankly, we just were't feeling it, dog.
We tried to ignore him and hoped he would fuss himself back to sleep. No luck. Shortly after 4 a.m., I'd had enough of his concert, thought maybe his tummy was bothering him, and woke up the other two dogs to let them all out. The other two dogs looked annoyed. Hey, this wasn't my idea, I tell them. Blame the little dude.
Sure enough, the little dude's tummy was bothering him. And by bothering him I mean he was hungry. I know this because while the greyhounds went out to potty, he planted his butt on the kitchen rug by his bowl and waited for me to fill it. This dog woke me up at this ridiculous hour for his flippin' breakfast.
In the interest of getting at least a tiny bit more sleep, I fixed his breakfast. Dog food looks pretty gross most of the time; at 4 a.m. it's positively disgusting.
While Stormy is dining I keep myself occupied by watching a little tennis on the kitchen T.V. and unloading the dishwasher. I am, at this point, wide awake. After he scarfed down his breakfast and made a visit to the backyard potty, I corral up all the dogs, send them back up stairs and finish tidying the kitchen. Then I head back to try to catch a little more sleep.
I wandered back into my bedroom to find Dexter and Stormy in my previously occupied warm side of the bed. Snuggled up next to my husband. Stormy looks at me and rolls over. "Rub my belly" he says.
Oh. No. He. Didn't.
At this point I am calling him names that are not fit to print in a family newspaper.
Maybe the cat was right and I need to haul these pooches to the pound. But at half past 4 in the morning, I start wondering if the cat put him up to it ("OK, if you whine loud enough during the night she will get up to feed you," I imagine the cat whispering to the pup. "I do it all the time and it works like a charm. She won't mind really.") I swear most conspiracy theories are born in the wee hours of the morning by sleep-deprived minds. Certainly all the ones involving talking cats, right?
Remind me again why I love these critters? Seriously. Remind me.
(Full disclosure: I really have no right to this bitter rant. Most mornings my sweet hubby is the one on early-morning dog care duty. This story is very familiar to him, except for the 3:30 part. That's a new one. Love you, honey, appreciate all you do. Really.)
So what time DID you get to work? You're a better woman than I. I may have done a little shouting. Though this comes from the girl who held a cup of water for her poor sick kitty to drink from this morning. People who don't get this just don't get the love.
Comment by heatherfroeschl — January 23, 2009 @ 9:01 am
My (now teenage) kitten still does this. In the middle of the night he gets hungry and decides it is breakfast time and he will do whatever he can to wake me up, which involves pushing on my face, jumping around on a plastic bag, sharpening his claws on my clothes, throwing my alarm clock on the floor, etc. I can usually trick him by pretending to get up and when he runs downstairs I shut the bedroom door behind him. Luckily he hasn't started howling yet like your puppy!
Comment by Michelle — January 23, 2009 @ 9:53 am
No problem honey. Thanks for getting up this morning and, even more importantly, THANKS FOR KEEPING ME OUT OF THE PICTURE.
Love Ya
Comment by Phil — January 23, 2009 @ 11:17 am
Think that's a bad start to the morning? What about being awoke multiple times during the night by a sighthound who would rather you sleep either somewhere else or in a different position? All for HIS comfort, of course.
If I fall asleep on the sofa, even for a nap, I get nose-prodded, jumped on, stared at, whined at, peed on (yes, even that), or worse until I begrudgingly get up and fall asleep somewhere else. Why? Because my dog can't stand me sleeping on the sofa. He doesn't want the sofa for humself, he wants to sleep on the bed - with me. Not without me. Ever. And, what about the bed... if I move in the night, once again I get harassed until I awake and change positions so that he'll be more comfortable. At least once a week, he gets kicked to the floor or his own bed. Yet, still, I am harassed until at long last, morning comes and all thought of sleep banishes.
I love dogs, but some mornings it just doesn't pay to wake up with opposable thumbs!
Comment by Laura Green — January 23, 2009 @ 12:59 pm
I hear you on that one, Laura. We have two large sighthounds and they dominate whatever piece of furniture they happen to choose. I start out lounging on the couch, but Dexter jumps us and soon I am relegated to a small set while he stretches out. He snuggles in between me and my husband in our queen-sized bed, and soon we are hanging off the two sides while he's spread out in the middle.
Our fault for spoiling them, I know.
Comment by Nona — January 23, 2009 @ 1:27 pm
It looks like the little dude and Dexter are all comfy in the bed! I sure can relate to that story very well..I have many times been hanging off the side of the bed so that I won't bother the "children". Once, a few years ago when I had four pets on the bed with me, my dog was so close to me that I actually fell out of bed in the middle of the night barely missing the window and the night stand. That was a rude awakening! The things we do for our dear pets....I'll say "that's okay...you guys just take the entire bed...I'll sleep on the floor!" (I haven't done that yet except for the time I actually fell out of the bed!!).
Comment by Deborah — January 24, 2009 @ 7:39 pm