A couple of months ago, after a sobering trip to my doctor, I signed up for a short triathlon to help keep me motivated as I worked to get back into decent shape.

Other than a two-week layoff during a particularly nasty cold, my training has been going reasonbly well. I’ve been swimming, biking or running about five or six days a week.

I’ve lost about 7 pounds, which isn’t as much as I’d hoped for but better than nothing. I just broke under 200 pounds, which means I could probably have made weight for the masters clydesdales class if I drank a big jug of water before the event. (Actually, do they even weigh you in for that? Or is it just on the honor system?)

But everything almost all came to a crashing halt today when I nearly died — trying on a wetsuit.

After a couple weeks of digging I finally located the old Wavelength suit I wore back when I was doing these things in the late ’80s and early ’90s. It was in amazingly good shape. It is also a medium tall. Medium? I didn’t think I ever wore medium.

I knew it was going to be a rough one. So I stripped down and got to work. The suit was tight on my legs, but it got really ugly when I got the chest. I got the thing zipped up, but it was so tight I had a flashback to those old football practice fumble drills when I’d end up on the bottom of the pile. I could breath, but barely. I was even a little claustrophobic. I wasn’t much under 185 even back then but I guess 15 pounds is enough to make a BIG difference.

Bottom line, there’s no way I could swim 25 meters in that thing, let alone 750 meters. So I’m loaning it to a skinny co-worker who’s also doing the race.

I’ve got an full-body surf suit that’s larger, but I expect the lake will be too warm. So I guess I’ll wear the neoprene shorts and shirt I use for cool-water kayaking. It’s not exactly sleek, but it’s not like the extra drag is going to be the difference between me finishing on or off the podium. I could wear the best wetsuit in the world and ride the best bike and I’d still finish way back.

But I will finish, which is the goal at this point.